Rest and I have not developed a congenial relationship over the years. I leave the house at 5:45 a.m. for an hour-long ride to work - I do dictation in the car and edit copy in the commuter train.

More than 11 hours later I return home, greet my husband, gulp some food and rush to a church meeting or tackle a stack of work.

Of course, I put a Christian face on my rapid pace, rationalizing that my "busyness" is good stewardship of the talents, gifts and energy that God has given me.

But that is all that it is - rationalization.

God has built into each of us a need for rest and for time alone with Him. Without that time of rest I lose three elements vital for my service to Him: recuperation, revitalization and communion

When my husband and I were first married, we launched into the usual compromises that couples make. Despite my frenetic pace, I had always reserved Sunday afternoons as a time to "crash" - my own private interpretation of resting on the Sabbath. My husband, however, liked relaxing by having our house filled with family and friends.

I began each week exhausted. My husband and I discussed our schedule and took steps to keep a day of rest. Still, something was missing.

As I prayed about my unease, God showed me that I had not observed a Sabbath rest - I had replaced one set of activities with another. I had excluded God's reason for rest: time with him. I had kept the "rules" of the day, but not the heart. I was not resting to commune with God. I was resting to indulge my own personal desires.

Once again I sought God's help. How could I keep the heart of Sabbath rest?

God's answer: "Prayer. Your activity is not what I need. I need you to rest, to listen."

As I reserved time for prayer, I began to hear God, to see him more clearly through Scripture. Before that I had abandoned communication with God and had focused entirely on recuperation, leaving no room for God to revitalize me with His Word and His Spirit.

By God's grace I am beginning to see the impact of reserving a time of rest for Him. I feel less anxious, and I worry less. I don't fret; instead, I pray. I have a Scripture verse tacked up on my office wall: "My health fails; my spirits drop, yet God remains! He is the strength of my heart; He is mine forever!"

Through rest God graciously continues to offer me recuperation, revitalization and communion with Him. Without those gifts I could not keep up the pace of my activities.

It is only through communion with God - on the Lord's Day and throughout the week - that I can be equipped to serve Him. I pray that God will continue to show me how to replace "to do" lists with recuperation; freneticism with revitalization: chaos with communion.